The advent of Halloween…. and the holiday season is officially upon us. And with Halloween, the candy, costumes, decorations, all of it, comes holiday stress. The holidays seem to become more important each year, often rising to the top of our stressful life events list. Coping with holiday stress can prompt a seasonal adjustment disorder.

For many, holidays can be one of the year’s most stressful life events

And before you have a chance to even think about how to manage, you need to start thinking about cooking up turkeys and putting up other colored decorations. That doesn’t take into account things like menu planning, guest list making, calendar checking, gatherings, seeing family that you have managed to stay away from all year, etc, etc…. it goes on and on. Collectively, the holidays comprise one of the top stressful life events.

Yes… it’s Halloween, and then Thanksgiving… and then…. many people start to dread the next two months. They know they have a long list of things to do and not enough time to do it all. Anxieties rise as family starts talking about plans for the upcoming festivities. Who is going to have dinner at whose house and who is going to be upset he or she is or is not the host this year?

Holiday turkeys need lots of preparation

No matter how organized you might be, decorating always seems like a nightmare; decorations aren’t where they are supposed to be and lights miraculously became tangled in an untouched box. Don’t forget, there’s shopping for presents and fighting the crowds at the mall. It’s no wonder that people feel like they lose their mind this time of year.

Unhappily, for many, holidays produce holiday stress, often with an accompanying lapse into various forms of depression, sadness, loneliness, all of which intensify when contrasted with the joy expected from the holidays. The syndrome is called seasonal adjustment disorder. Additional symptoms of adjustment disorder can include acute loss of concentration, physical ailments such as stomach aches, headaches, and sore muscles, mood swings, increases in anger and/or crying, even drinking more alcohol, overeating, or overspending.

Holiday stress can produce acute loss of concentration

Many factors contribute to holiday-related, seasonal adjustment disorder:

• associating the holiday season with unresolved family issues or a painful childhood experience,
• unrealized expectation for holiday-related happiness,
• facing the loss of a loved one with whom you have shared past holidays,
• unrealistic expectations of family and friends,
• being away from family and friends,
• feeling isolated from others,
• reflecting on losses or disappointments over the past year,
• coping with changes in family obligations or disruptions of traditions due to recent marriages, remarriages, divorce, or death,
• drinking more alcohol, a depressant, which is more available during the holidays.

Things you can do right now to help relieve holiday stress and avoid seasonal adjustment disorder

Everyone expresses their anxieties in different ways. Identifying what your anxiety signs are may help you understand yourself better. Before the season rush begins, start a journal about things you do each day and your level of anxiety. Journaling, besides helping you track events, behavior and emotions, is, in and of itself, a therapeutic (stress-relieving) activity. As you approach November and December, keep writing and reflect on how you felt before these two months. You will start to see patterns and/or differences in what you do each day, how you feel about what you do and how you cope with those feelings. This will show you the way you are dealing with holiday stress.

Planning the perfect holiday meal often increases holiday stress

Keep yourself feeling well by eating healthy. Don’t let the holidays become a free-for-all when it comes to indulging yourself. Overindulgence (overeating) and lack of exercise will only add to your stress and guilt. Have a healthy snack before holiday parties so that you don’t go overboard on sweets, cheese, or alcoholic drinks. Continue to get plenty of sleep and physical activity.

This is the time of year for cheer and joy. Reach out to friends so you can step back and create some fond memories for yourself. In addition, you definitely want to engage in some stress-managing behavioral strategies that will help you calm your nervousness. Develop a plan for reducing stress. Denying stress only masks the problem, and pretending to be happy when you’re not will only increase the stress. Avoid isolation; reach out to people you trust. These people care about you and can often bring support, empathy and companionship.

Stay away from perfectionistic fantasies, i.e. wanting the holidays to be “perfect” or “just like old times.” The truth is that families and friends grow and move, and holiday traditions change. Thus, it becomes increasingly difficult to create a perfect holiday event. Choose a few favorite traditions and adopt some new ones. Just remember when it comes to the holidays—perfection should not be the menu-de-jour.

Get out and move around. Autumn and winter holidays correspond to periods when we tend to spend more time indoors and there is a tendency to move less. Movement and various forms of physical activity are natural stress reducers.

Exercising with friends is a great way to manage holiday stress

Physical activity causes the release of a spectrum of neurotransmitters and hormones that reduce unhealthy stress. So, join a gym or get some exercise DVDs to move at home—including aerobic activity, stretching, and weight work to build endurance, strength and flexibility. Exercise keeps us fit and happy, so find something that you will do.

If you have suffered a recent loss, you need to form a new association with the holidays: do something different for the holidays like take a vacation with a family member or friend. Spend time with people who care about you. Do not isolate yourself. If you feel there is no one available, then reach out to others in need. The key is “doing something”: the joy comes form the doing. For instance, attend a religious service or community gathering (e.g., candle lighting ceremony, public concerts).

Holiday traditions and rituals are known to be key seasonal stressors

Don’t obsess about losses, sadness and loneliness. Family and friends may be concerned; let them know what you need from them. Get help if you need it. Talk to your doctor, a mental health professional, or minister or rabbi. Look to the future: make some plans for after the New Year to help avoid the post-holiday let down.

Stay out of your head; don’t obsess. This is one of the key mistakes made during holiday crunch time, and can easily and quickly exacerbate levels of holiday-related stress breakdown. Examples are obsessing over thing like, “the meaning of the holiday season”, “what are we celebrating”, “what values are associated with the holidays, and are we practicing them”, and, “the house has to be perfectly clean or elaborately decorated”. Don’t compare to past holidays. Don’t obsess over traditions and rituals that you might practice. It’s okay to re-evaluate past traditions and then let them go. Just try to enjoy the activities on which you choose to participate. Don’t obsess over how you are feeling emotionally (e.g., irritable, frantic, impatient) and physically (e.g., tense, hunched shoulders, clenched fists, tapping foot). Don’t examine where your thoughts are. Challenge yourself to let go of thoughts, agendas, etc and simply appreciate the moment. Do something: Observe those around you. Interact with someone. Remember the rule: think less; do more.

Set a holiday budget. Do not equate love with cost and quantity of gifts. Consider giving the gift of your time and service. Ask people what they want instead of searching for the perfect gift. Shop early so there is more of a selection and you have time to really choose. Don’t head toward the mall in 5 o’clock traffic or during peak times. Shop on the Internet.

Be selective: choose only those holiday events you want to go to

Manage your time; set priorities and let go of impossible goals. Don’t try to complete everything at once or over-schedule yourself. Leave some time for the “unforeseen”. Don’t feel you have to accept every holiday invitation; chose only those events you want to attend. Don’t let your “to-do” list control you. Take advantage of opportunities to wait. Rather than spending that time feeling irritated and looking at your watch and to-do list, think of time spent waiting as a gift: the gift of time.

Take time to enjoy your life this holiday season. Stay active, stay out of your head, and avoid seasonal adjustment disorder.

Stay healthy.

Happy holidays!

Be Sociable, Share!

Tagged as: adjustment disorder, coping with holiday stress, coping with stress, holiday stress, seasonal adjustment disorder, stressful life events, stressful life events list, symptoms of adjustment disorder

{ 0 comments }

Adjustment disorder is the crippling impact of stressful life events that can leave you feeling stuck, depressed, anxious, lost, confused or just plain desperate.

Adjustment Disorder often brings feelings of desperation

Such feelings come from the kind of behavioral paralysis embodied by such woes as “I don’t know what to do with my life”, “I used to have dreams, but now…” and, the ever popular, “I don’t know where to start”.

Well, it’s time to act. This week; today; NOW. It’s time to apply an intervention I call “think less do more”.

The Logic Behind Think-Less-Do-More: Why it Works
Adopting “think less do more” into one’s life is not as easy as its sounds, but the rewards it brings can make your efforts worth it. When we apply “think less do more” to coping with stress, we become effective and resilient because we take control over stressful life events, rather than feeling victimized by it. This is particularly important in the treatment of adjustment disorder.

Taking control of the environment

By being action-oriented we more effectively gather information about our surroundings, and thereby change and improve our actions to better serve our goals.

First thing you should know is that you are capable of adopting the “think less do more” paradigm. You have abilities as well as desire, so listen to these parts of yourself. Seriously, stop talking to yourself, roll up your sleeves and do something… almost anything. You can start by setting simple, achievable goals. Aim for a weekly goal, keep your head down and do the thing you set out to do. Do it for the next couple of days, then for the next couple of weeks, then for the next couple of months. Keep the momentum going. And only after you’ve pressed yourself into action in this way, pull your head up, look around and reflect. But be careful: Too much reflection could dilute your progress: put you right back into your head from whence you came.

I’m not saying that you shouldn’t be conscious about what you do, just don’t let your consciousness define you at this point. Momentum is critical, particularly in the early phase of “think less do more”. The more you do in the initial phase (as in taking up a new pastime), the faster you will learn what you like and don’t like. And then you’ll be able to reflect more constructively. Mistakes are good (see below).

Rehearse, rehearse, rehearse

Think-Less-Do-More: Acting “As-If” means you’re already there

If you know something works for you, continue to take advantage of it. If you see benefits in going to the gym, practicing guitar, or writing in your journal – then, don’t languish in thinking about making those more prevalent in your life… make those things become a part of you. Treat them as though they were second nature, like a reflex – something that you don’t even have to think about anymore, because it is so common to you, like chewing food or walking down the street. By doing something over and over again, you build those habits into your brain, and they become automatic.

Learn to love the things you do: act “as if”
A good way to build a habit and learn to love doing is by acting “as if” you do. Make it a source of pleasure by acting as if it already is. Just like many enjoy the unconditioned pleasure from sex or food, we can learn to elicit pleasure from doing other activities. Just imagine how good it will feel being productive and organized, not missing a step in your busy work schedule, or receiving an A on your final exam. When you act “as if”, you allow yourself to be there already, thereby learning how to identify more easily the pleasure that comes from the action: you can learn to love doing it.

Don’t Worry About Mistakes
Sometimes doing more results in more mistakes: this is to be expected (given the general increase in one’s activity) and should not deter you from your action-appointed mission. While it’s good to be aware of your mistakes, there are some things that aren’t worth paying attention to. Sometimes little things might threaten to ruin your day, but don’t let an insignificant something screw up the benefit of a whole day’s “doing”. Remember, “think less do more” means staying out of your head as a way of forgetting about these things we can’t change, instead of wasting energy being upset or frustrated. Sometimes it can be difficult not to sweat the small things, but a bit of “who cares” can often be enough to diffuse the bomb of inhibition before it is blown out of proportion.

The Bottom Line
Adopting “think less do more” as a prescription for the symptoms of adjustment disorder is not something that is achieved overnight. It is a constant work-in-progress, and it requires a conscious effort to build.

Think-Less-Do-More requires practice and is not achieved overnight

What is mentioned above is merely a rough guideline on the theme and on the general attitude you want to take, but truthfully this more a process of self-discovery than an act of change. Everyone varies on how they take on “think less do more”, and what level best suits their goals. A good starting point is to identify an action you want to take, and then make a committed effort to practice it. Remember, the joy comes from the doing.
===================================
Technorati claim code: US674GZXSDN8

Be Sociable, Share!